CMJ = Clusterfuck of Marketing Jerkoffs

Tomorrow begins the music biz orgy known as CMJ. It's essentially a week of the most mind blowing ass kissing you'll ever witness.

Thousands of music biz elites will be in NYC checking out bands they have to pretend to like to impress their peers. Hundreds of shitty bands will play for free in order to please these people. The few exciting bands worth seeing will play to crowds of folded arm assholes who spend the whole show texting their assistants. The bands real fans will have almost no chance of actually getting in.

Meanwhile, those with CMJ badges (a mere $450) will be able to attend panels where aging music biz insiders talk about how awesome they are to a room full of people dumb enough to think they know what they're talking about (the music biz is dead, don't listen). By the way, if you actually bought a badge don't expect to get into any good shows. Anyone who's done this before knows that thing is worthless if a half decent band is playing - get on a list or don't bother.

And there it is - CMJ. NYC's answer to SXSW. Enjoy... and RSVP!